Americans Are Weird About Sex

The Spirit of Puritanism Haunts Its Libido

I was talking to a girl born and raised in Italy who was briefly vacationing in America. The topic of sex came up (shocker) and she mentioned how relationships tend to look in Italy.

“You wake up. You have sex. You go to the beach. You have sex. You come home and shower together. You have sex. You take a nap. You have sex. You go out to dinner. You have sex. Repeat.”

It’s well known that Italy has a more romantic, passionate, and more sexual culture than America. You’d be hard-pressed to find a couple who has that kind of a sex life here. Yet, for some reason, America doesn’t have the reputation for being an unsexual country.

As I mention in The Myth of a Hypersexualized Culture, people tend to believe the exact opposite about America. Buying power dildos at CVS and gooning to Pornhub all day does not make you a sexual or passionate person. It makes you profoundly alone. Trust me, I’ve felt Italy’s heat. The ‘hypersexual’ Americans are faking it with batteries and pixels — 1 in 5 young Americans haven’t fucked in over a year (IFS 2021).

Sexless America

If you hear about couples fucking like rabbits here, it’s just the ‘honeymoon phase,’ a sad blip before the high-stress Puritan grind of American life snuffs their fire into a roommate slog. It makes people feel dumb for craving jaw-dropping sex.

Americans are awkward about sex. Americans don’t have a shared cultural sexual identity — they still see sex as taboo. Most Americans fumble the bag, because they’re clueless or scared shitless.