On Male Masochism and Emotional Neediness

Diagnosing the Mommy Girlfriend fetish

There is an increasingly prevalent fetish where men want to be dominated by women, either emotionally, physically, or sexually. If you’re as disturbed by this phenomenon as I am, then you probably have some questions.

As a libertine, I’ll try to not be too harsh here. I’m an advocate for people seeking out physical sex rather than frying their nerve endings with vibrators or their neurons with porn. But something about this phenomenon feels very off. Almost akin to being a furry or a cross-dresser. As a man, the components of this fetish violate the most basic elements of classic male heterosexuality.

Let’s review those basic elements.

The man should protect. The man should provide. The man should make the first move. The man should have his shit together. The man should be trusted to make decisions. The man should dominate the woman sexually. The man should be mentally and emotionally independent. The man should want to be dominated by no one. The man should be the man in the relationship.

If we aren’t on the same page about the basics, then you’re not going to like the rest of this post and it would be best to close this tab now. If we’re on the same page, then let’s continue and take a look at some memes.

Sure, these are just memes. But the nature of memes implies they have some grounding in reality. You don’t have to scroll the internet for too long to find many men who indeed fantasize about women sexually dominating them.

This isn’t just an internet phenomenon. I’ve heard too many stories of girls with boyfriends (or, more often, ex-boyfriends) who wanted to be dominated or even humiliated sexually. I’ve heard girls complain about men who are emotionally needy. “I hate feeling like I’m his mother.”

I’m going to make something clear before I continue:

Women hate being in dominant roles regardless of if they say they do. If they do this for too long, they either cheat or go insane.

It doesn’t matter if she’s an executive girlboss or she willingly dates men who like to be slapped around and pissed on. Deep down, she hates it. And this isn’t just my opinion. Some women claim they like it, but the data suggests otherwise — included below. Dominant men and submissive women is the natural order.

I’m not going to pretend like I care about each individual couple who find themselves in these positions. I’m mostly curious about why. I also think it’s detrimental to a society that is already highly feminine and is oriented around the emotional sensitivities of women. This phenomenon only makes matters worse.

Why do men want to be dominated by women now? Where did society go wrong? Where did their mothers go wrong? Did they learn this from somewhere? Were their fathers dominated by their mothers? Can anything be done to fix this? What the fuck is going on?