Beyond Cringe Gender Wars: On Love - Part II

The spirit of the Ruthless Romantic.

Love is not something to be looked for. Love finds you when you open yourself up to its possibility, and when you put yourself in conditions it can find you. The mysterious forces behind all things move people for reasons you will never know and have no control over. Life is boring for most people, they are either too scared to take risks or too paralyzed by the biases in their mind. 

Life is Default Boring Now

We live in a very boring time. Barely anyone has a cool job. Hearing about what someone does for a living might make you want to blow your brains out. “Some tech thing.” Cool, you look at a screen too, no one cares. Few people are passionate about what they do. They work for money, which is fine and necessary, but it isn’t what they were born for. And I’m not trying to romanticize jobs either, some people were bornto craft Italian leather, serve as military leaders or be famous entertainers. Similarly, some people were born to just press buttons on a keyboard, serve food to the elite, or pick up trash. It’s harder to tell the difference lately. Doing something you aren’t supposed to be doing takes a toll, it drains you.

We live in a gay world. America is declining rapidly. The people who run it hate its taxpayers and want to replace them. The EU is following America’s lead on that. Everything is about race and whoever is most dysgenic this year. Everyone is becoming poorer due to inflation. The only war going on is so fake and gay it can’t inspire the most patriotic country boy to fight. Everyone’s scared, bored, tweaked out, or on edge. Our culture is fake, there’s nothing interesting or cool going on. Living in a declining empire is demoralizing.

Gay world, gay job. Where does one find a little excitement? You have three options to get your hands dirty: drugs, posting or romance. Sometimes combining them is fun, but mixing them isn’t for everyone. Dealing in romance is still legal (barely), so let's assume you’re taking that route to a more exciting life.

If you read my Substack then you’re likely on X (yes, I’m calling it X now), and witness the excruciating, stupid, frustrating discourse about dating. 

Gender Discourse Should Be Mostly Ignored

If you open up X for 10 seconds you will see that the “gender discourse” is an absolute nightmare. Barely anyone has anything thoughtful or unique to say. The people who are most inexperienced in love, sex, and relationships have the most passionate opinions. It’s just yelling at each other, unpleasant like a sidewalk couple’s quarrel. Everyone is memed into swallowing bullshit then passionately debating who took the best load.

Scared Men, Silly Women

I see men on X being outright mean to women. Making fun of them for getting older, something they have no control over. [Side note: I have no issue with pointing out the increasing BMI of women in America because they do have control over that.] I’m also okay with rudeness towards hardcore leftist women because they are the cause of much destruction in America. But otherwise, I find men being unnecessarily mean to women both cruel and childish, which shows a misunderstanding of the traditional roles of men and women, despite their supposed yearning for “retvrning” to said values. Women are extremely sensitive to the opinions of men. 

“Girls just wanna have fun” is a fundamental truth and sometimes, they do be saying stupid shit. Women like to have fun and be guided. Woman says silly thing, man either laughs it off or guides her in the right direction. That’s lindy. But sperging out and calling them old roasties every time they say something that won’t pass an academic journal review or your arbitrary moral code is embarrassing and not lindy.

Some men on X genuinely hate women. That’s not something I can address through anything I say or write, since it likely goes back to something deeper involving their mother, an ex girlfriend, lack of female attention in their formative years. It’s heavy stuff. I’m not wading in murky waters like that, as it’s extremely personal and unique to each man. The majority of therapists are feminine frauds who enable bad behavior and self-destructive thinking, or they’re just pharmaceutical sales reps. Extremely few therapists are capable of actually helping anyone, so I wouldn’t necessarily recommend it. I wish them luck finding themselves, or the closet door. 

To balance my point, a man harboring no deep frustrations with the particular qualities of women is a man who has never spent a lot of time with them, or is white knighting. It’s natural. “Can’t live with them, can’t live without them” is an old, very true phrase for a reason. Men (ideally) operate based on linear time and have an innate understanding of self-accountability, women live entirely in the moment and truly believe nothing is ever their fault. There’s a healthy level of frustration to be had there, especially if you deal with women every day. However, if the things men typically hate about women are seen as features and not bugs, essentially accepting feminine nature as it is, they can come to understand and yes, love women. This principle can apply to anything really.

Newsflash: Women Shit Test Men

As a misogynist, I don’t take women’s words very seriously. I don’t see them as political creatures or beings operating on principle (to be fair, neither do most men these days). Women are slaves to their hormones. Women are silly, fun, and extremely susceptible to charm. So when women say silly things on the internet, I don’t get riled up, because women post on X for the same reasons they spend hours on their makeup and the right outfit — to get attention from men or to flex on other women. Sometimes women do or say things just to see a man’s reaction, a shit test. 

When a woman says something stupid or silly, the best option is to have fun with it, make them laugh, or to simply ignore it, rather than sperg out and throw a temper tantrum. And if you’re trying to show them the way, they’re going to listen to you and respect you if you make them laugh and come off earnestly. If you’re angry, you lose, and if you’re having fun, you win either way. It’s that simple.

Room for Criticism

There are, of course, legitimate reasons for each side’s frustrations with the other, especially in the world we live in. Women are fatter than they used to be, men are less masculine. Both sides can do something about that, and neither is forced to involve themselves with someone they’re not interested in. But we live in rapidly changing times where everything is either falling apart or advancing significantly on a weekly basis, which has the same effect on the mind. There’s a lot to keep up with, the old world recedes behind us. 

Some people are very attached to their grandparents’ values, and are objectively correct that those values were better than the ones currently normalized. But those times are over. They just are. There’s no retvrning. Whatever comes next will be completely new, and you may not live to see it. Your country is not the one built for your grandparents. It’s built to accelerate decline. And we’re all in the middle of it. Some lifestyles that made sense in the past don’t anymore. Previous incentives changed or vanished completely. Everything is shaken up. You can either kick, scream, and argue as everything changes, or adapt. 

X Gender Discourse Is Rooted In Fear

Calling the gender topic on X ‘discourse’ is an insult to the word itself. It isn’t discourse, it’s bitching and whining. The whining is mostly about dating apps, “bodycount” and women being less interested in having children. Do you notice a theme here?

“Well I would date, if the damn bodycounts weren’t so high!”
”Well I would date, if it weren’t for these superficial dating apps! They’ve ruined women you see!”
”Well I would date, but women don’t want to have children anymore!”

Who are the fixed, stoic, iron-willed Nietzschians in such complaints — men or women? When reading this, who would you assume is the more malleable sex? Who holds the power here? I smell feminism, not misogyny. 

Bitching doesn’t change minds. It only puts filters in men’s heads, makes them frigid and presumptuous when meeting new women.

“Uh, it’s the first date now. Nice banter, but at what point do I ask her how many men she’s slept with and how soon she wants to have children?” You’re turning into pussy repellant. 

What about getting to know her? Seeing if you two have chemistry? If you can make each other laugh? If you enjoy each other’s company? Those are the things that matter.

Are you trying to find the right woman or are you just looking for excuses to not participate at all, or run away as fast as possible? While some topics are legitimate and mildly interesting to discuss, what drives all this discourse is fear.

If everyone is as concerned about marriage, children, and the future of western civilization as they, there are more interesting, substantial questions worth asking:

What makes for a satisfying relationship?
What makes for good parents?
Why has the divorce rate been so high since the mid-70’s?
For the couples who don’t get divorced, are they satisfied with their marriage?
Were your parents right for each other?
Were your grandparents right for each other?
What are the effects on children who are raised in an unfulfilling marriage?
What would the world look like if every married couple were right for each other?
What would that require?