Today’s topics:

Analyzing too much during dates
Afraid to use dating apps
FOMO in relationships
Dating as a single parent
Bringing a new girl around your explicitly racist friends
Women with tattoos
Fear of death
Fear of making eye contact & starting conversations
Looksmaxxing
When to set up a date on dating apps
Girlfriend has a crazy family
Girlfriend watches hardcore porn
Favorite cocktails
How to stop arguing with women
Girlfriend is neurotic
Growing your account when you’re not anonymous
Girlfriend wants to track location
Foreplay
Comments/Not Questions

Paid subscribers can ask me anything by joining my chat or DMing me directly.

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The topics of Session 4:

On SSRI’s
Is my girlfriend alphawidowed by an ex?
Relationship where both people cheated
How to read eye contact at bars?
How is confidence built?
Managing men vs. women at work
Right person, wrong time
Dealing with attention hot girls get
Pros and Cons of East Asians in the US
My boyfriend wants a “career woman”
On belief in demons
On late bloomers

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In Session 3 we discuss:

Interracial relationships
Husband doesn’t last long in bed
Caring too much
Autistic friend who scares the hoes
My disagreeableness
Medcast
Career options
Signs You’ve Found “The One”
Long distance relationships in the military
Book recommendations
Arguing with women
Leading women on
Career options II
Women who can pull off red lipstick
Getting out of your head in social situations

Interracial Relationships

Subscriber: What’s your view on interracial relationships? I’m white, but I tend to not be attracted to white women. I see the benefit of dating within the same racial background, but the chemistry hasn’t been great. The way white women smell doesn’t agree with me. Having a negative preference for my own race doesn’t feel right, though.

Med: I believe people with parents of very distant races live life in a state of existential confusion. If your father were Swiss and your mother Spanish, that isn’t very distant genetically. You’re ethnically European. But if your mother were German and your father Somalian, the genetic distance is greater than that of a wolf and a dog. This is why it doesn’t feel right.

A significant amount of your personality is directly due to your ethnicity, so their children will have a difficult time having a complete understanding of themselves because the parts competing against each other are playing by different rules. I would take this into consideration. Cultural barriers in relationships are very real, and shouldn’t be underestimated either.

Husband Not Lasting Long

Subscriber: Dear Med, I (25, F) am in a very happy marriage with my husband. Everything is perfect, but one thing: in my opinion, he doesn’t last long enough in bed. He does take the time for me and he’s able to make me cum only by penetrating and almost every time we have sex, which is amazing! But the sex itself - and I mean actual penetration - only lasts for like five minutes… We’ve talked about it before and he’s says he finds me super sexy and loves fucking me and he can’t stop himself. I gave him the advice to experiment with breathing and solving match problems and what-not, which does seem to help a bit, but not enough. We also have sex regularly, and I suck him off randomly to take the pressure off of him. Still, it doesn’t seem to work.

Now, I don’t want to bring it up again because I feel bad for him, but I can’t fight the deep desire within me to be fucked for a longer time by him. Again, I’m grateful that he’s able to make me cum almost every single time, that’s really special, but I just want him to last a bit longer… How can we fix this?

Med: You have the right attitude about this and it’s good to hear that he’s at least making you cum.

What’s he’s saying is true — he does find you super sexy and he “can’t stop himself”, in that exact moment. Men reach a “point of no return” where Jesus himself could command him to not cum, and he’s going to cum anyway. What he needs to learn is how to get comfortable living in the moments that build up to that moment, which is usually done through edging. But there are other ways.

I’m not going to say you should tell your husband to start jerking off and be more mindful while he’s doing it. But you can turn this into a game. Before you blow him next, tell him to tell you when he’s about to cum (if he doesn’t do that already). Then stop. No, I’m not saying you should blueball him. But do something else before you go back to it. Kiss around his leg or his balls or whatever. Make him wait a minute or two. This will extend the amount of time you can blow him. Repeat that a few times. This is the “area” he needs to be comfortable in.

Graphs that compare the female orgasm to the male orgasm show women building up to it, and men going from 0-100 immediately. This is physically true, but not mentally. While men don’t have a buildup in the same way women do, men can know when they’re on their way up and stop themselves, or at least pace themselves.

If he’s fucking you fast from the beginning, or is going fast the whole time, this is likely a big reason why. If you notice him going too fast too early, tell him to slow down. Not in a scolding way of course, but to shift to a more sensual pace. Tell him you want to feel every second. Ideally, he will be more comfortable in this area, and will be able to switch from slow to fast. This will make the sex more dynamic and will help him build up to lasting longer.

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In Session 2 we discuss:

Flirting Better
Ending Things With a Girl In Your Social Circle
Dating in Germany
Getting a Vasectomy
AI’s Impact on Culture, Dating, and Socializing
Social Media Detoxes & Why Boredom is Good
Dating Multiple Women at Once
Recharging Your Social Battery as an Introvert
Book Recommendations
Girls Who Sleep With Black Guys
Male Instinct & Wanting To Only Date Virgins

Enjoy 🤍

Flirting Better

Subscriber: Hey Med, hope you’re good I’ve been getting better at funnymaxxing, which has helped a ton with breaking the ice and adopting a more unapologetic demeanor. Listening deeply without judgment and being attentive to others has also been a major boost for my relationships. That said, beyond those set of skills, I struggle with flirting. I’m still too much in my head and don’t know how to develop a flirtatious attitude. Overall, I feel too rigid when I try to be seductive. I can make girls laugh and listen well, but escalating the situation and seducing is something I haven’t honed yet. Thanks, Med! TL;DR: How do I flirt?

Med Gold: Flirting is an act of playfulness. Being lighthearted, and not taking life too seriously is required in order to flirt properly. Being able to make fun of yourself allows you to lightly make fun of other people. But I must stress the word lightly. Poking fun at someone without making them feel bad or pointing out something they might be actually insecure about. Flirting can also take place through direct compliments about a girl’s appearance or saying something you like about her personality. But if you’re trying to shake the part of you that comes across too rigid then I would focus on being playful. This comes down to loosening up and not caring too much about the outcome.

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-Addiction to Toxic Sex
-Low Libido Gf
-Avoiding Temptations to Cheat
-Understanding The Foot Fetish
-Should Women Lovebomb Men?
-Should Underfucked Women be Institutionalized?
-Why Lesbians Aren’t Real
-Total COVID Revenge
-Relationship Topics That Should Be Discussed More
-Social Anxiety
-Ghosting
-Texting After 1st Date Sex
-Setting Boundaries with Insecure Girls
-Condoms vs. Pulling Out
-Age Gap Relationships
-Anecdotal Questions

Enjoy 🤍

Addiction to Toxic Sex

Subscriber: Hi Med, love your content. Keep it up! Right now I’m stuck with a girl that I really like but don’t love. We’re in a situationship since 3,5 years and the sex is just mind boggling but I cannot see her being the mother of my children. One of the reasons is that I cannot trust her 100%. Also she’s Instagram addicted and seeks a lot of external validation. But the worst part is that every time we’re spending more time together, e.g. on a vacation for a week or living at each others homes for a couple of days, we’re always fighting. She makes drama about all kind of things and I cannnot wrap my head around it sometimes. Next day we’re having sex 7 times (a day!). Deep down I know that I should break up with her but I keep coming back because maybe I’m a sex addict and the sex with her is just rough and amazing that I never had before. I’m in the mid thirties, had 2 serious girlfriends before and slept with maybe 30 girls in total so I would say I have a bit of experience. But I feel like I should stop seeing her anyway to find my dream girl but I cannot get to pull the trigger. It’s just so damn hard because I do really like her. Any thoughts?

Med Gold: I know what you’re going through. You probably aren’t a sex addict. But you are addicted to sex with this specific girl because you are both filling a void for each other that few others can fill. Like all drugs, the high is euphoric but the comedown is miserable.

You have two options:

1. Keep having sex with her. You will have sex with each other until one of you gets tired of the hangovers or finds someone they’re willing to commit to. It will take several tries and likely won’t be pretty when it ends for good.

2. End it. This will be incredibly difficult.

This will feel just as hard as quitting a narcotic. You may not have physical withdrawals, but you absolutely will have spiritual, emotional, and sexual withdrawals. Avoiding this is what keeps people in toxic dynamics.

I suggest option #2. Tell her as fun as it is, this situation isn’t good or sustainable for either of you long-term. Then cut her off for good. Block her number, block her social media, and avoid all contact for at least 3 months. Then suffer. Don’t try to replace her. It will suck, but you will come out the other side a new and better man.

The longer you continue to have sex with her, the longer you are standing in your own way of finding your Dream Girl.

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